Thank God for unemployment. I just got my letter in the mail and I will be able to get enough to live off of for four months. Not enough to save money or make too big of payments on debt sort of money, but enough to buy food, pay rent, andthat sort of thing. whew. That's a huge relief.

But, unforetunately, in the last fifteen minutes since I've checked my mail I've felt "the fear" subside. That was the thing getting me to want to go look for a job -- the thing that has gotten me online pouring through want ads for three weeks. Now I don't *have* to do that. I can subsist. That's kind of shitty. That, and I really want to go to freakin' Europe (though I may not have to do that either)...so now, maybe that I don't *have* to get a job, that cynical side of me that likes to flip off the world will say "go fuck yourself unemployment office, I don't need yer fucking checks..."

we'll see.