like a knee in the testes

I am by no means a manly-man. I am not the sort of guy who meets a girl, grabs her by the hair, and drags her around a bit -- showing her off to my friends on the way to my bedroom where I treat her as little more than a platform for several warm, moist, orifices in which to deseminate my over-the-top hormones. (Man, I sound like one of those "I hate men" lesbians when I talk about other guys, don't I?)

No, I am one of those guys that likes to like a girl, love a girl. I like to befriend a girl, find out if she's worth uncovering my heart for since it's an either/or with my heart -- either stashed deep inside or way the hell out on my sleeve. I treat women, just as all people, with the utmost respect and certainly do not treat them as a means to horny end...but rather as a wonderful, beautiful, and amourous end to themselves.

That said, when a girl reminds me that I am a "nice guy" and rather "inexperienced" in comparison to the vast majority of asshole guys out there, it is rather upsetting to me. When I am told that I lack assertiveness or passion by a girl, just because I won't immediately slip my hand up her dress in the first ten minutes of knowing her...or even after knowing her for months, feeling that it's more appropriate to wait until she is ready for such a thing...it puts me on the defensive, feeds my self-hatred, makes me feel like I'm somehow less of a man because I'm not like the rest of them. It fuels my shyness, heightens my self-awareness, and steals my thunder, if you will.

...it makes my balls suck up so far inside me you might mistake me a eunich if you saw me naked.

Please don't do that.